Circa 1997/98 - this Comic was born.

yes, it is horrible.
No, it does not make sense.
No, it really isn't supposed to....

The purpose behind it was that it was the VERY first serial comic attempt i ever made.

The purpose of POSTING it here is to show you how it was changed when i redid the comic some years later. Keeping the same non-sensical story and theme and just doing the COMIC better.


So here is the commentary linking these together.
Old Cover [link]
New Cover [link]

Comments for the Covers: The old cover is just dorky. There's no getting around it. not even a good idea for it. the new cover is just loads better

Old page 1 [link]
New page 1 [link]

Comments for the first page: the old one goes against the flow of the comic, drawing the readers eye away from turning the page. there is also a "lot" of text for a (technically) 1 panel. And its all the text in it that disturbs the flow and determined the direction of the art.
Therefore, the new page 1 was flipped, the idea of the page was kept, but the dialogue was shortened to help the flow.

Old page 2 [link]
New page 2 [link]

Comments for the second page: the old page 2 was a grand total of 2 panels, though i had really liked the top one.
The new page 2 is 2/3's entirely new art, but with the dialogue that was cut off from the new page 1. The bottom of this page uses the panel idea from the top of the old page 2.


Old page 3 [link]
New page 3 [link]

Comments for the third page: Old page 3 was VERY cramped, as if i was trying to cram in there what i had left out of the first two pages...i liked some of the ideas behind it (like scottys transformation from man to 'crinos' (werewolf) and then to lupine form. The NEW page 3, therefore, is now only 5 panels long instead of 9 panels long and almost catches up to where the old page 3 leaves off. I think that the remake of Scotty's transformation was really well done in this version and i'm very proud of it.


Old page 4 [link]
New page 4 [link]

Comments for the fourth page: Old page 4 is 7 panels of confusion. Even someone who KNOWS what is going on is going to get confused. thats all there is to it. NEW page 4 finishes off the last 3 panels from the previous old page, and starts on clearing up some of the confusion from old page 4. What is happening is that tatsuo is using a reflective surface to 'disappear' from the real world and enter the umbra. while it is STILL massively confusing, the sequence runs much smoother and looks nicer.


Old page 5 [link]
New page 5 [link]

Comments for the fifth page: Old page 5 is another 8 panels of cramped confusion. NEW page 5 finishes off where old page 4 left off and takes one panel of the old page 5. So no, we haven't quite caught up yet!


Old page 6 [link]
New page 6 [link]

Comments for the sixth page: Old page 6 is the beginning of the end. again, it had some cool ideas, but i didn't lay it out righ and its cramped. NEW page 6 instead finally finishes off where old page 5 finishes off. It's still not perfect, but it works.

Old page 7 [link]
New page 7 [link]

Comments for the seventh page: Old page 7 is where it ends. If you thought some of the other pages were confusing and cramped, well you're in trouble now. NEW page 7 doesn't even touch that. New page 7 takes care of 4/5's of old page 6, using some of the same sequences, but properly done this time. well. at least better anyway

Old page N/A
New page 8 [link]

Comment for the eighth page: on old page 6, the comic left off with vincenzie giving chase to poledra. This is where the New page 8 starts. It ends with the first panel from old page 7 where Thomas (our token human of a group of werewolves) announces there is a problem.


Old page N/A
New Page 9 [link]

Comment for the ninth page: And finally, we come to the NEW end of the comic. Again, I've spaced this out so each page was less cramped and the timing was completely different, and easier to understand. While i left alot of the IDEAS behind each set of panels intact, i added or subtracted ones as i deemed necessary and adjusted with my improved art the ones i felt could stay.

this last page was particularly trying because i'm just not that good at drawing monsters. This page took the longest to draw as i actually redid it 3 times!

OVERALL RATING:
Old comic - good ideas, poor execution. Sloppy, cramped, poorly timed and laid out, confusing, poor art quality
New Comic - same basic ideas, better execution, not as cramped, better timed and laid out. Less confusing and much improved art.

SIGNIFICANT improvement.

Please let me know what you think.

Oh - more on the origin of the story used: these were characters from a game we played, all based in the world of darkness: Werewolf the Apocalypse. the story was a dialogue i wrote (at like 2 am one night) with game injokes based off of a misunderstanding of how the umbra (essential to a werewolf's survival) actually worked. This is why it is very nonsensical.

so why did i use it? i needed subject matter to make a comic for a MAJOR class project. This dialogue proved to be sufficient fodder. And i passed the class! Years later i looked back at it and said, "how did i pass this class again?" and decided to retry the project. It took so long to finish since i never had any intention of publishing it and so it was a personal project.